Could it be my soleus, Jon?

Another milestone of life I reached reluctantly today, a key event that reminded me that my aging process was continuing on course. I experienced a foot/leg cramp and the inside of my foot cramped up, so that I felt a need to force it open with my hand. as a former medico I wondered WTF?? I thought immediately that I must have foot cramp cancer with only weeks remaining, and then I wandered into the kitchena Ca ++ and looked around the kitchen for potassium.

The excitement was to continue. After correcting my electrolyte imbalance I looked in my car and saw that my canteen spilled itself all over my cheaper cell phone (the one that poaches eggs but doesn't draw a bath). Anyhow, water soaked phones don't work well, though perhaps after a few days of drought that will change. Fortunately I may have one or two backup cellular communication devices. I have located a few and am now better prepared for future hydrological emergencies.

Overcoming some initial difficulties, I managed to exhume a charge-retaining battery and then install a dry sim card in one of my smaller back-up mobile phones. Entering the spiritual plane once inhabited by Robinson Crusoe as he returned to Europe after his eternities alone on an island, I reconnected with civilization
(13 hours of electronic isolation stoicly endured) just in time to discover my arch nemesis, one certain Lt. Gen. Suwat Tumrongsiskul,a Thai copper now in cahoots, and some evenings in more than that - NUDGE, NUDGE, WINK,WINK - with Mary Lacy (a real life D.A. in Boulder, Colorado; not, as one might reaonably infer, a character of fantasy existing neither in Law&Order spinoffs nor in any other areas of my imagination) had collared my chief suspect and were now accepting excessive accolades praising the fruit borne of my decade of undercover work: the investigation and infiltration of pre teen beauty contests.

These investigative leads had focused my attention on my on-line classmate, fellow scholar, and Christian educator Johnny Karr, who in our class chat rooms expressed deviance, imagination, and interest in NAMGLA membership.

I suspect that Patsy Ramsey's recent, convenient death from "cancer" in conjunction with predictable repeated violations of sixth amendment protections will postpone the trial of Johnny Mark Karr until I obtain my J.D. from the Law School of the Carribean when I will be uniquely availableto provide him with the type defense he deserves.